_Letter to the MOGgers_
Nkay Kyle,
Here's the thing... _THING_ ;P Just kiddin.
For real this time & with feeling, I have a confession to make to all of you. I know what is thought of the rag Rolling Stone, I couldn't agree more - though I wouldn't say it's lizzie's tushy wiper (that's reserved for the McPaper – right Mike :) ), I sadly can’t even say anymore that I get it for “the articles” ;P
I have a friend – he’s slightly below music junkie level – if only for the fact that, though he has a “MOGpage”:http://mog.com/Tallpo, he has been on it ONLY TWICE in approx 2 months... this makes him a Music Junkie... (said as only Borat can)
H1. NOT !!!
I’ve tried for the last two years to get him on board with some of the better music rags – A better way to describe it is a “hand towel”: http://www.sierratradingpost.com/p/,92095_Canningvale-Luxury-Hand-Towel.html?cm_mmc=PaidPlacement-_-MSN-_-WMSNS7-_-Canningvale_Luxury_Hand_Towel from lovely Egyptian cotton “made to the highest standards of luxury by Canningvale of Australia, this hand towel features low-twist cotton yarns for super absorbency and lavish softness”. The other is one you can get a WalMart – it will dry your hands, just don’t expect it to dry anyone else’s for the next day or two while it unsoggifies itself. Paste & Blender respectively.He really digs “PASTE”:http://www.pastemagazine.com/, wasn’t all that thrilled with Blender. That’s cool.
You see, it started way back in history, when PoPo & lizzie were just outta college, see. Lizzie was a poor & destitute lady of the evening who could barely afford to keep shoes on her 20 children, let alone feed them. PoPo was rolling in the dough – he’s a teacher – you know how OVERPAID teachers are right ??? So for Christmas one year – after PoPo married into a very wealthy family, & lizzie had managed to squeeze out 10 more chilluns, she decided to get him a subscription to Rolling Stone – she got it mailed to her cardboard box, why not give PoPo the gift that keeps on giving – but not HERPES ;P A few years after that – she adds Blender to the gift list... ‘snot syphilis neither.
Cut to last Christmas, it’s October, lizzie has finally gotten herself a respectable job, auctioned off all but three of her kids, (still hopeful though ;D ), & decides it would be a really great gift to give PoPo, Katerina (longtime MOGreader – not yet at MOGger status – I keep trying though) & “ahfeckit”:http://mog.com/ahfeckit. She checks in with PoPo – hey, what are your thoughts with Paste/Blender & _cough, choke, sputter, sputter, ROLLING STONE ??_ Wouldn’t you know it, he LOVES Paste, We’re not worthy, dislikes Blender – well yeah it’s gone downhill the past few years so we can cross that subscription off the list (of course I’ve paid for my subscription to run til the end of 2034 – but that’s how they get you), but still wants & _cough, choke, sputter, sputter, ROLLING STONE !!_
Here lizzie was hoping she could cancel that one – she’s sick of getting it – hardly reads it – lest she finds an _”article”, wink wink, nudge nudge, knowwaddImean knowwaddImean??_ ;P Now she’s been suckered into another year of crappy ass crapper. Oh well, now that she’s got a respectable job, she can handle both subscriptions...
So what to my wandering eyes did appear last night – NO you IDIOTS, NOT SANTA... lizzie’s biggest girlcrush since Tori & her straddled piano bench, none other than the tattooed, beehived, newlywedded, black cat eyelinered... wait for it...
H1. AMY WINEHOUSE !!!
That’s right kiddies, sometimes it pays to get the shite mag ;P. I haven’t had the time to give it a real read – but on a cursory glance – looks like it’s a much better article than the blurb in US Weekly. I gots a brand new bag & it’s my rag with AMY, (love you girl) WINEHOUSE.
I’ll give it a thumbs way up or chop them off already down once I get it read ! Just had to share my jubilation with y’all !!!
The only thing better than seeing my girlcrush AMY WINEHOUSE, TORI or “Anna”:http://mog.com/Anna on a cover of a magazine, who (Anna) will be seen touring very shortly with _Right Said Fred Zeppellin_ & the soon to be named hardcore – way better than Tenacious D & their lousy pick o’ destiny, “Hey Jack, I gots your pick, rid’ere” (I already got my NYC lingo down, yo !) band that incorporates all the bands we love & of course all the band that everyone loves – but still with our own new sound & spin on the rest of it so we don’t sound tribute-y. We’d sound like the yet to be named fantabulous band that rocks out with a recorder player ;D & all sorts of MOGGERS rockin’ the stages with us – step off Polymorphic Spree – your days of being the largest band are SOOOOOO numbered ;P
Now I think I can go to NYC for four days – after laying this epic post on y’all... I’ve purged what I had in me after seeing that cover last night – had a lot of fun doing it & hope you have as much fun reading my insane ramblings as I did writing it :)
Just a video before I go... A tribute to the ladies above I’d love to see on a Magazine cover, & the man, the myth, the legend’s musical I will be seeing in _TWO DAYS people_, I can’t believe my _Spring is Awakening_ in TWO DAYS ;P OK, scratch that – Couldn’t find a video of the song Magazines... Here’s one I dedicate to all the _GGWE_: Good Girls With EDGE - you know who you are ;), The Sheikster, all y’all... miss you already :) & Jeff Buckley... found this while trying to find the perfect Duncan video... I've seen Duncan perform this song once or twice. Is it just me, or do you think that even Buckley’s speaking voice is sheer mellifluous _Grace_ ??? A loving tribute to Jeff from Duncan - two of my favorite men :) No matter where I turn – he’s there... my “Flying Buckley” !!!
H1. CHILLS !
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I have to disagree with you, I would take Lily Allen any day over amy..........then again thats just me.
I would be making the same face if I got to stand next to her.........
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Good lord girl, you've got me laughing and crying in the same post ... whew that video really got me. Have fun at the shows and travel safe ... we'll look forward to hearing a fantabulous recap from you next week. :)
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Hang on, I can't hardly read this through the schoolgirl squealing, on both genders, even.
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Kevin:What is it with Lily Allen ? Seriously, why you likey ? She's cute sure - but there's little to no soul in her vocals. On the other hand, Amy overflows with MOTOWN soul, for me - don't get no better than Back to Black - she rips my heart out on that one.
gmo: Hey girl - so glad you had the same reaction I did... I'm writing the whole thing cracking myself up - I know it's sometimes considered a less-that-lovely trait to laugh at your own jokes - for me it's more laughing at my mind on the page... scary in a totally hysterical way... HYSTERICAL - that works for both sides ;P
BUT the REAL THING OF BEAUTY:
My main man Dale You HANDSOME DEVIL YOU !!!! That band's got NOTHING on you !
If you are ever back on the "market" (& I hope you aren't... but just in case;) ), I hope you'll give me a ring... you're too hot to handle sir - good for you, you did your sis lizzie so proud _FOR_ you !!!
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Umm ... thanks ... I think. That's it, I switching avatars, sheesh! I'm fine as a friend, but I don't think you'd like me as a paramour, what with all the moral constraints and such. ;)
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Darlin - all in good MOGgery. I wouldn't dare & yup we do have a bit too much going on that anything other than bro/sis, MOGfriend might proove disasterous ;P
I still say, _lookin good, papi_ keep up that pic at least for a few more days... want to see it when I get back to MOGland...
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I think part of it is the fact amy is just too damn skinny. I forgot who said this, but if I had at her she would have to take me in shifts
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I think that right there Kev - that was your most humorous moment... seriously. & whoever said that - give them a medal & a man who can take her up on that shifts thing... I'll let it slide ;P
I agree - she's worse than a twig - you'd snap he in half before you got even 1/5 of your shift out - trust me :) She'd be like a marathon runner - even after a few minutes - she'd need a break with electrolyte replacements & deep tissue massage.
That would be my biggest fear with His purpleness - if someone asked me would I do him & I said yes of course, this is purely hypothetical of course, of course ;P
She's got to put on some weight. From what I understand she got such crap from the UK press about not being svelt enough to begin with - she went into a tailspin & now looks like an emaciated model sans the model "looks". My girl crush is all about her music - it's not about looks... hey wait that sounds familiar (nope too easy) I'ma take the higher road ;) Plus I can't make a joke about a guy who looks like a muppet - muppets are cuddly & so totally rock - even if they are a muppet of a crotchety old man with an attitude problem ;P TAKE THAT :) (I'll help you, _SNAP_ ) !!!
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Man that Kylie's got some big .....teeth. I mean it, they are huge. Freakin horse chompers.
You know Liz, you got to slow down your typing, I just can't read that fast.
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Hey - _soft porn on MOG_ - well done Kev - way to class up the joint... you gonna throw a video about weed at me now - don't bother - chances are I know them all - if I don't, I'll check some college pals & get back to you ;) What are you trying to say with that video anyways ? I am a little obtuse, can't keep it _in my head_ ;)
Go check out my post on the Chaser-rollo Buboo, you'll laugh your tush off - promise.
& REMINDER - I leave tomorrow at 9am (on the bright) - will be packing before that - so a MOGmail before I leave FOR 4 DAYS from my favorite muppet would be MUCH appreciated.
I also gotta state for the record - though I love the artwork in your latest avatar (very cool)... I miss the angry, (what did some other MOGger use to describe it) oh yeah - that's right - CONSTIPATED pic of Waldorf ;P
Snap, DOUBLE SNAP, THREE SNAPS IN A "Z" FORMATION... BRING IT ;P
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Making up for the lost time I am already stressing. I imagine that I will have 400-600 notification emails re all my trusteds on MOG ... hopefully it will slow down a bit over the weekend ... still, that's going to take some serious time away from work next week ;)
& with regards to Kylie - not much else on her is large - so I figured you weren't being euphamistic (sp) ???
Kev & I on the other hand... maybe just a touch...
Four days Chris - you get four days of lizzie-free chillerrific typing that goes at a leisurely pace - that is, unless I find a webcafe or something - but then my fear is I'll stay in there all day - & I wanna rock out the NYC for the 4 dayz I'm there !!!
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Have a great time Liz!
If I could suggest a restaurant?
Try the Moon Rock Diner.
313 W 57th St New York, NY 10019 (212) 397-3131 It's near the Lincoln Center.
Tight seating, its NYC for heaven sakes.
Great linguine and if you wander the neighborhood you might find the place Bela Bartok died. There is a cool bronze statue of him coming out of the wall of the building.
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W 57th - we're going to be having bfast on W 57 @ Norma's... will have to see about having dinner as well :) Thanks Chris - see you Monday night :)
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Is it just me or does Amy Winehouse kind of look like a man? ...I am just sayin.
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Not saying she doesn't - still girlcrush just the same - it's all about the music baby... to twist PDiddlely Widdley's words to suit the topic ;P
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Jeez, Marigold. Amy don't look like no man I know - and I live in San Fran where the men are men and so are the women (at least some of them). Don't much care for the tats, but she a babe - and it was only a matter of time before those trend-sucking leeches at Rolling Stone stuck her on a cover to try and suggest a hip cred that they lost a long, long time ago...